HONORING THROUGH HEALING
Mechelle Holbrook
Today’s Scripture: “Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice.” Ephesians 4:31, ESV
Theme: Release bitterness towards parents, not because what happened doesn’t matter, but because following Jesus is right, and the benefits are many.
WHEN OBEDIENCE FEELS HARD
Boy, this is a hard devotion to write. It seems simple—clear instruction from Scripture—but we’re living in a broken world where broken things happen. Sin has touched everything, including parent-child relationships.
That’s part of why I chose this devotion. I know not everyone grew up in a fairytale with loving, healthy parents. I didn’t. I was raised in a very broken home, with a mother who struggled with severe mental illness. There were three of us children, all with different fathers—and that alone probably tells you a lot. I don’t need to go into all the details for you to understand the weight of that kind of home life.
GOD REDEEMS WHAT IS BROKEN
But here’s what I do want you to hear: God is good, and He is faithful. And He loves you. What’s so amazing about God and His Word is that He can take what is broken and make something beautiful. You just need to let Him.
In Ephesians 4:31 (ESV), we’re told to “let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, slander, and malice be put away.” That includes the hurt, pain, and bitterness we may carry from our parents. Why? Because God wants to bring healing into our lives.
WHAT DOES HONOR LOOK LIKE?
I think it’s safe to say that most parents don’t set out to intentionally hurt their children. But hurting people also hurt other people. So, the question becomes: how do we honor parents who have hurt us deeply?
I can’t say I’ve done this perfectly. And I can't tell you exactly how this will look for you and your situation, but I can say that, by God’s grace, I have forgiven—and He has brought and is bringing healing to my heart. Notice, I didn’t say He fixed every situation or restored every relationship. But He did heal me.
God loves my mother. He loves your parents, too. They are made in His image, just like you and me. They are broken people in need of a Savior. And sometimes, honoring them means wrestling with God’s Word and asking Him to help us release the past and walk forward in freedom.
HONORING DOESN’T ALWAYS MEAN CLOSENESS
How? Honoring our mothers and fathers can be making the choice not to dishonor them. It can be living your life in such a way that it breaks the cycle of hurt and pain. Honoring our parents doesn’t always mean restoring closeness, especially if the relationship isn’t safe or healthy. It may mean praying for them. It may look like choosing forgiveness. It could be a phone call, a text, or a card—or it might simply be releasing them to God. Every situation is different, but God’s call to honor remains. Honoring our fathers and mothers in the healthiest way you can is honoring God.
Make It Personal: Think about your situation. Think about how God sees your parents—that they are made in His image and are deeply loved by Him. Does that change how you see them?
What is one step you can take toward honoring them? That might be something tangible, or it might be something that happens quietly in your heart.
Also, if you would like to explore additional support to work through abuse and intense hurts, there are local Professional Christian Counselors you could reach out to and partner with. The Cove also offers Celebrate Recovery on Tuesday Nights at The Cove Mooresville Campus, 6:30-8:30 pm. Celebrate Recovery is for everyone who desires support for any struggle they are walking through. (Thank you to Lisa Johnson and her thoughtful input and advice while preparing this devotion.)
Pray: God, I lift up those who carry hurt and pain from their parents. For those who have lost a parent and never found closure, I pray that You would comfort their hearts. Remind them that You are the perfect Father—steady, loving, and near.
Heal our hearts where they are still wounded. And for those of us who still have our parents, help us to honor and respect them in the way You’ve called us to. Give us wisdom, discernment, and grace for each step.
In Your Name, Amen.
Read: Ephesians 5:1, Romans 12:9-21, Matthew 6:12-15
Weekly Memory Verse:
“Listen to your father who gave you life,
and do not despise your mother when she is old.” Proverbs 23:22, ESV