INTENTIONAL PARENTING
Kimberly Lawrence
Today's Scripture: “The righteous who walks in his integrity--blessed are his children after him!” Proverbs 20:7, ESV
Theme: Intentional parenting pays off in blessings for your children.
A WOODEN SPOON GENERATION
I was raised by wooden spoon-wielding parents. I realize that may not be a popular parenting strategy today, but it was part of growing up as a 70’s kid. I can probably count on one hand the number of times my parents actually had to USE the spoon on me or my sister because the threat of it was often enough. When I was in third grade, an art teacher came into our class as a special guest. We were each given a wooden spoon to decorate and take home as a gift to our parents. In a most ironic turn of events, THAT spoon became known as “the spankin’ spoon.” It still exists today and can be found in my mother’s kitchen drawer. My parents may not have been likely to quote scripture in my house, but they were certainly proponents of the biblical principal of “spare the rod; spoil the child” (Proverbs 13:24).
Before I had my own children, I was the perfect parent. I thought I knew exactly what it would take to raise well-behaved and well-adjusted kids. It would be easy! I would speak to them respectfully and logically, and they would listen. Simple! I’m sure I don’t have to tell any parents reading this that real parenting life goes nothing like that.
THE SPORT OF PARENTING
Parenting can be an extreme sport, especially with little ones. Aside from the obvious physical labor of keeping up with them, consistency and discipline take hard work. Then when they are middle schoolers and teenagers, job duties further expand to include emotional and social development. Feeding and watering kids to keep them alive does not a parent make. We must be intentional, and never grow weary, to prepare them mentally, physically, and spiritually for this life. The motivation for endurance and stamina in this “sport” is to arm your children for a blessed and fulfilled life.
The Bible is full of instruction on creating a life fulfilled. As parents, we are called not only to council our children on spiritual directives, but also model those behaviors daily. We are to be living examples. Children may do what we say but will more often do what we do. Spiritual lessons are better caught (by example) than taught (with words alone). Titus 2:7-8 (ESV) teaches: “Show yourself in all respects to be a model of good works, and in your teaching show integrity, dignity, and sound speech that cannot be condemned, so that an opponent may be put to shame, having nothing evil to say about us.”
Correction with good counsel takes energy and steadfastness but will help our children experience peace as a result. A child who has never been taught self-control, boundaries, and respectfulness for others may struggle in life. They may wonder why it’s difficult to form productive relationships with friends, extended family, and in the workplace. If we fear displeasing our own children by correction, and we fail to teach these important lessons in the safety of our home, life will teach them with a heavy hand. We must be motivated by the love we have for our children to best equip them.
Make It Personal: One of the most powerful ways to show love to your child is to be intentional and consistent in parenting them. They will thrive on the structure that this predictability brings. Having consequences in the home will be far more tolerable lessons than those which a harsh world will eventually teach. Allow them to first learn about personal responsibility, honesty, respect, integrity, goodness, kindness and dependability in your home and with you as an example.
Pray: God, thank You for the blessing of children in my life. I want to live by the fruit of the Spirit so I may serve as an example of these valuable attributes to my children. I pray they will embody them in their own lives. Help me to not grow weary or fall into the trap of prioritizing what this world values. I seek Your guidance in parenting by Biblical principles so my life and that of my children reflects You. Amen
Read: Hebrews 12:11; Ephesians 6:1-4; Deuteronomy 6:5-9
Weekly Memory Verse: “Let all that you do be done in love.” 1 Corinthians 16:14 (ESV)